Fat Greg Dulli #6

Excerpts from the zine Fat Greg Dulli, issue #6

Greg Dulli Subscribes To:
“Sassy” to keep in touch with “what the little girls want” and because he’s determined to one day be named Sassiest Boy in America!

“Mirabella” to nuture his feminine side!

“National Geographic” photos of topless African chicks and old guys with plates in their lip are good decor for the tour bus!

“Newsweek”, “Tiger Beat”, “Martha Stewart Living”, “Cigar Aficionado” somebody sent his name in with all those little subscription stamp things and he still can’t get off these damn lists!

Greg Dulli One-Night Stand Kit:
Nifty Afghan Whigs money clip and dice cufflinks
8 miniatures of Wild Turkey
2 packs of Dunhills
1 bottle of rib sauce
3 moist towlettes
“Karaoke With The Staples Singers” tape
“Best Of America” karaoke tape
1 Today contraceptive sponge
17 condoms
Don Fleming’s phone number

Exciting News Items From Our Midwest Sources: (it’s old)
Greg lives in Hyde Park, a wealthy section of Cincinnati, with bandmates Steve Earle and Jason from Throneberry. He used to drive a blue Chevy Econoline van, but now he’s usually seen just walking. He’s nearsighted and used to wear big round blue glasses, but that was years ago and we presume his swarthy good looks won out and he’s opting for contacts. He keeps mum about his relationships, probably because he’s just saving the material for the next record. He’s a big fan of Italian food and barbecues and he doesn’t really do drugs. He used to wear navy blue pocket t-shirts and black chinos alot, although sources infer that he may have just been wearing the same outfit. A lot. He’s said to remember everything friends say, much to their surprise….Greg goes on exotic vacations and recently went to French Morocco and Amsterdam. Greg doesn’t wear cologne and one source says he’s a sloppy kisser. His birthday is May 10th.

Comments
2 Responses to “Fat Greg Dulli #6”
  1. Laura says:

    I went to highschool with Greg. He sat behind me in Biology class. All I remember of him in those days was how cocky he was. I wonder now if he would remember me if I ran into him in LA, as I live in California myself. I am a writer myself now and it would be interesting to talk to him again.

  2. Adrian Pomn says:

    Is this the same Greg who is over in England eating all the pies? I recently noticed his golfswing is being limited by his extending waistline, and he is starting to hit it like a pussy.

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